Wednesday, October 08, 2014

Happy 14th anniversary =) !

Between all the girls I know who took off their veils I decided to celebrate the day I wore mine, unfortunately I can’t remember the day but it was around summer 2000.

14 years of struggling.. people who were trying to convince me to take it off, people who stopped talking to me after wearing it and most of all people who give me the “look” when they see me.
For wasn't so easy as I thought….

it’s not easy when you go to the beach seeing all the bikinis or attending prom and weddings seeing all those short, sleeveless , gorgeous dresses.
It’s not easy seeing all those summer clothes…seeing all those hair styles especially when you have a nice hair.
it’s not very easy to wear a veil in Egypt especially when you are very ambitious person with multi-talents like me =D

it’s not easy when you find your friends taking off their veils after wearing it for a looooooooooooooooooooooong time, I never asked anyone of them “why” they did it , or what changed their minds about it? But from their changes I knew it was getting rid of restriction, which actually made me have some doubts…maybe second thoughts…after all I’m not a perfect person my mind was full of “what would happen if?” and I wondered what am I missing exactly?
I decided to look back again at my life and see what did the veil actually bounded me from doing, it was really hard because I couldn’t find one single thing!

In fact I realized that it made me…free.

Free from the restrictions that the world put and loaded us with, the discrimination hidden under a fake “democracy”
I literally did everything I wanted to do…. I worked in magazines after being rejected by sum because of the veil, I played music even though people never stopped opening their jaws from the shock!
And finally I was rewarded with having an amazing man in my life, who sees me beautiful and respects the way I am. I didn't
miss anything in the world!

I guess those reasons are more than enough to make me hold on to it forever , may God gives us all the strength  to hold on in this world =)

Friday, September 05, 2014

just like today...

just like today my life was renewed
everything became different, taste different,feel different, even my life became so a new born child who came out into a new world..seeing all around with a different eye.
there wont be looking at coz there is no back any life started, just like the blooming rose.
now i feel complete and my jigsaw heart has no missing parts.

Sunday, August 03, 2014

A simple reunion

i love witnessing my friends and family happy moments..lately i've been to a young, friend and sister's wedding. it was a great reunion for my band and I as it;s been a long time since we met or been in a place together.
playing music with them was one of my best phases in my life, they made a huge change in my life...they are friends that i really cherish..we've done so many things together and we've been there for eachother like one family. i loved seeing us growing up..having our own lives...each one went on his sweet own way but yet i still carry them deep in my heart remembering ever beat and slam we had.
p.s::make someone happy by calling them unexpectedly, no matter how close or far yu were some people just belong in the heart =)  

Wednesday, July 30, 2014


ساعات حاجات غربية بتتغير جوه الناس مش بتكون باينه ايه هيه...بس تبص للواحد كده تقوله انت فيك حاجه غريبة .... هو فعلا احنا بنتغير ولا الدنيا الى بتتغير...ولا كل حاجه سابته و السن بس هو الى بيتغير؟
العيد عدا و من قبله رمضان والناس كلها بتترحم على رمضان زمان و عيد زمان طيب ايه الى مانعنا ان احنا نجيب تانى ايام زمان؟
اكيد عشان التفكير اتغير و الحاجت الى كانت بتفرحنا مابقتش هى..يعنى مثلا الفستان المنفوش الى كله ورد ملون الى كنت بنام واحلم بيه عشان البسه دلوقتى مبقاش يقرحنى... طب هو ايه الى ممكن يفرحني دلوقتى؟
يمكن اشتياقى لسن الواحد ماكنش بيهمه اى حاجه ولا اى حد...ماكنش بيبص ده لابس ايه ولا عامل ازاى.. سن كان الواحد اقل حاجه بتفرحه.
انا اول مره احس انى كبرت اوى كده :) 

Monday, June 30, 2014

Blessing start

it was a great coincidence having my birthday in the 1st day of ramadan,as i always believe that ramadan represents new beginnings, here i am.. beginning fresh new...with a new age in ramadan.
i've lost so many people last year and i assure that 2014 wasn't really as best as i thought , but i'm hoping that the better is yet to come. there were many changes in my life recently and it gives me the feeling that better things are coming my way.
i feel more open and ready than before to start my own life with my own new family, it feels like i'm a new born child and the past life i had was never there, i seems that everything happened to me was long time away..long enough that it's fading gradually that makes me almost can't remember it.
i was also sparkling this year in my career, i was able to prove to myself that any dream can come true no matter how hard it was or far it seemed.
i'd say elhamdolelah hundred thousand times...actually i'd say it as much as i can for all the blessing God gave to me..
elhamdolelah for having a beloved, caring family
elhamdolelah million times..for giving me the greatest gift, the man of my life, my future husband and his family..
elhamdolelah for having supportive, helpful colleagues
elhamdolelah for having the ability to educate and guide young people
elhamdolelah for having my car =)
elhamdolelah for having so many people who makes me happy
elhamdolelah for making so many people happy
elhamdolelah for stayin alive till this moment....for every breath i take..for waking up after sleeping
elhamdolelah for realizing when i drift away from Allah...and for Him accepting me after sinning...
elhamdolelah for loving worshiping Allah...and loving His 3ebadat =)
elhamdolelah for loving Quraan and feeling its ayat =)
i can go on like this and it would take endless posts...

elhamdolelah =)

Sunday, May 04, 2014


It all started one day when i decided to attend "Socrates cafe" i had no idea wht am i going to do there or who am i going to meet, i absolutely knew no one there, except for the name of the person who announced it...
Bassem Sabry, 19

yes, i knew him since he was 19 years old...finishing college (i was just starting mine), i remember myself back then, i was a very shy teenager, very quiet, passionate about writing and interested so much in philosophy..tht's y i was attracted to "Nirvana" articles.

i don't know how did i changed, but i consider it a huge turning point in my life, it helped in creating the person i am rit now, more confident, very full of hope and believe so much in making a "change"

"Be the change you wish to see in the world", by Ghandi but in fact....this was his life i always quoted him instead...he enlightened my life path with his knowledge and thoughts...he believed in me so much that he helped me to publish my 1st poem...then my 1st writing...he refereed to me as "Sunshine"...he always called me so...he actually helped me to "Shine" and i never stopped using this name since then...i never stopped shining either =')

just few days ago as i was checking some old things, i came across my "Paradigm shift" notes...all those notes u sent to me on the little yellow said " Hello focus =) " , the other said " keep notes of what people are saying to able to write the article" and the third said " write notes but participate =)" 
that day was my beginning of my writings.
My new perception in life...all thanks to u...u opened my eyes to look through see things actually filled the empty glass of water to show me tht the glass is never empty...always full of hopes and dreams...dreams that can be attained...a nirvana that can be created..i know i thanked u before...but i'll never stop...coz it's never enf.

My friend and old brother...i never wished to live the day, where i would wake up and hear you are gone..
i appreciate everything you did to me...everything u taught me...

You'll always be are already remembered with everything good you did.

Saturday, January 25, 2014

See you in the square....

We went there for one reason
We went there for our rights


When I see u in the square
Which one of us will start the fight?

Suddenly we vanished
Through the gloom, the dust
Through the screams and the shots
And in a quick shift
The ground turned to red
Of the blood was shed
And nothing else was left


More pictures drawn on the wall


A memory of the fall