Saturday, March 29, 2008

sometimes i don't really get my self. like for now i feel i hate everything around me...almsot everything and everyone and i don't know the reason , i just hate when i feel hate
so angry and want to smash anything around
y can't i stop acting like this?
y don't i delete the damn blog and close my msn account!
i don't want to talk....
plz no on ask's malek!
i tried recording my voice today...God! i'm the worst vocal on earth =D...thank God i never sang infront of ANYONE . i never said tht i can sing but i like singing despite the fact tht my voice is terrible lol i still do sing to my self.

Friday, March 21, 2008

From the moment I entered the hospital I was pretty amazed , I never thought tht we would have something so great like tht in Egypt , seriously u'll feel as if ur somewhere out of Egypt. It's like a shining star in the middle of el syaeda zeinab and el madba7 , one of the 7 wonders in the world.
I can't even write it in words, u should go and c it ur self.
The place, the atmosphere , the ppl , the treatment , the order and organizing everything and I repeat EVERYTHING is so perfect .
I felt comfortable there…even while working I enjoyed working there, it was really grea8 to c all the kids happy being there.
I felt pity for the ppl at the institute they r suffering from many other things , not just the pain…
For the 1st time I felt tht I'm really achieving something , doing something useful for someone, the kids loved us there and keep waiting for us to come every day , even the ppl who work there loved us too they r happy coz we made the kids happy.
I just love tht place I love it and proud tht we have something like tht in Egypt , I love the kids I adore their little smile when I teach them something and they ran over to show it to their parents .
Rabena yeshfey kol mared ya rab.
isA I'll never stop going there even after colg.THANK U GOD I'M HAPPY

Sunday, March 09, 2008

I'm not so good in expressing my much to tell but can't get out of my cheast, i guess maybe when it's time i'll be strong enf to scream them out LOUD!!
but when it's i really gonna say eveything i want? everything i feel?
sometimes when i'm listening to a romantic song...i fly with my thougths and imagination and keep thinking of the day i reveal my feelings...both the good and bad, like to cry and laugh at the same time
i turn back and look at myself, we don't get everything we wish for rit? which things i should gave up ???

Saturday, March 08, 2008

i never asked my self tht...

why did i make a blog?
i feel as if i'm in a weird dream..i don't know wht's going on...i don't know wht am i doing.
as if it been yrs and yes actually it been yrs...lots of yrs.
many thing changed...whenever march comes...i recall my very old memories...coz it's the month were everthing started to take another way and my life became upside down.
march...the changing point...
sometimes i think for a while and ask myself a question.." is it really me? am i tht person who is now?" mostly the answer is NO.
i don't want to turn back the way i was and still i feel weird for the way i am now.
i want to stand still...i want to stop thinking of my past...i don't want it to affect my future or at least my present...especially tht i feel i'm so close to make my dreams come true.
whenever i'm closer whenever i feel more afraid...i don't want to be hunted.
i don't want to be left alone...i feel so weak and don't want to slip down again.
i hope tht march pass as fast as it can...or else can't we just skip it? can i remove it or delete it from the whole yr! can i go on as if it's april or something??
oh God! wht the hell am i saying!
i think i'm only......bored

Tuesday, March 04, 2008

I MET RA2ES EL GAM3A!!!!!!! =D....
yesterday i had an apointment with the president of cairo uni. Dr. Ali Abdel Rahman...the meeting was at 1:30 pm so i was there @ 1:20 pm...but we were finally with him @ 3pm =D....yeah he's a busy THANK GOD THANK GOD tht we had the chance to meet him...i think it's a really great progress !!! yes!!! i'm SO proud of myself elhamdolelah... i feel as if i can feel the ground under my feet where i'm standing and where i'm going. for the very 1st time in my life i feel i'm doing something...just a very small step through the future..
elhamdolelah for everything...bgad THANK U GOD!

Monday, March 03, 2008

so... it's been a while...very big one...

here are some news...

elhamdolelah i got gayed gedan last term...and tab3an tab3an elhamdolelah bas it's the 1st time to get gayed gedan and don't feel so happy with it...i'm sure i did more than tht...more to get a better gayed gedan not emtyaz...only better gayed gedan..i'm not sure if anyone can really understand this..bas Qadr Allah masha2 fa3l...and i'm sure tht Rabena hy3wadny be2ezn elah in something or another... =)

this term i'm more like... banta7er =D yeah i'm doing all i can and little of all i cannot...

i feel pain all over, my back my head my shoulders!!!!...physicaly and mentally

i might not rank anything....but i feel so glad tht i'm leaving something...something tht would make sum ppl remember me with =)...
i've never been famous in mylife except when i entered colg...i'm actually so glad abt it coz i'm remembered with good things...very good actually...i'm kinda prud of myself bgad =)...

i feel important...yes i'm an important person =D.... when ever a prof or a teacher needs something...they call for me ! andi feel great helping even greater when wht i did comes out almost perfect!...

again i'm proud of myself and feel more confident =).

today...i was an organizer with 2 of my a colg party...where we made a presentation and a documentry movie abt luxor and aswan..

and woooooooow they all clapped and the dean thanked us!

weeeeeeeeeeeew =) =D....

suddenly i felt tht i love myself!