i can finally breathe...sweet air is in. going through my hair gently making me shiver as if it's taking away my soul....
it's more liking flying , or floating softly on cold water as the waves come along and push me to the shore.
am i dreaming...
now i yawn and look out of the window..it raining...
so i pray and hope tht my dream come true

Y do i feel soo stupid?

it was a nice day today....but all of a sudden i felt my eyes so wet...dunno the reason of crying...and it's worse when u don't know y.
when i got home i wished to be better...but sadly it wasn't at all.
i hate silence...i hate it when i feel tht someone is really feeling bad and still not talking abt it...i guess it's kinda humilating...no...very actually
anyways...

i'm feeling better nowdays i changed my mood completely, i spent few days off colg
1st i went to agriculture , cairo university i spend a gr8 time with my friends there...God i missed tht kind of happinese..
today i'm writing form the AUC library...i came to watch the international day, it's really gr8 i tasted some food from KSA/ finland / North korea and i took many many pixs i guess i'll go get a tatto too.. =D i'm glad elhamdolelah i don't want to fell the stress again anyways we r almost done and exams r very soon..i'm almost done.

God!...i'm so tired...the past few days were really terrible...i hardly take my breathe..today i burst into tears..i couldn't help it...i do my best to hide my depression so i needed to cry and let it all out....i think by the end of the week i wont feel my feet on the ground.
i wish i can rest for a few days doing nothing and nothing at all

i simply love her...and love everything about her
i even can't stand to be mad at her ..a word or a smile erase it all in less than a sight.
i wonder y i love her so much..i can't live without her..
wht's so special in her...i don't know..i know her abt 9 yrs ago but couldn't get it.
even when we have hard times btw us and i think we r almost crumbling...it simply fades away like it never been there.
again...
i love her and i love the things i hate in her, i hope she'd know how much she means to me...it's so much tht even words can't explain.
God bless her and keeps us together and join us together after death...

Fine! fast heart beats , Qawlon and nose bleeding!!! , wht else should i get mentally?
Thank God i'm alive...
it's been a while...and now it's time..
i'd better sleep

ur never tired of it, r u?
can't u leave a single day without telling me how terrible person i am?
here is a thing if it's gonna matter to u...
i'm tired...i'm tired and don't know wht else i can do for u?
please don't make it harder on me..life is hard enf and i'm hardly trying to feel happy...
just for once don't destroy tht plz.... i let u to enjoy ur life...can't u leave me do the same?
u know wht u mean to me rit?

Gratitude

Thanks for every single smile u draw on my face

am i going to far? losing control of it?
i hope i'm not going the wrong direction and do the same thing once more...
don't wanna lose again..i don't wanna ruin it
should i step back alittle?
i'd better do i guess
but the thing is...can i?...can i step back?
ya Rab....






note: miss u spicy and slider =(

This thing we have...the thing tht i don't know wht to call uptill now...
it's weird tht it's even growing up stronger from the no where
and everyday is different from the one before
i feel i'm born again in a new phase..
somtimes i feel we r both kids playing around in the school play ground...watching cartoons...playing at the funfair...we laugh!
sometimes i feel we r teenage best friends who spend all the together...and suddenly in the end we realize tht it's not just friendship tht we are feeling...
sometimes i feel we r couples , dreaming together and sharing everything...and even preparing for our future...
i can't get it...
and i dn't think i want to understand..
i don't want to think abt it tht much...
just feel and enjoy the moment...

V.I.P : THIS PHONE IS NEEDED!!!!

I've been dreaming abt having this mobile tht nokia created last yr at the valentine and mother's day " L'amour collection"

sadly i couldn't get when it was down at the markets...and when i was able to...i couldn't find it anywhere...but i don't want to give up so easily...so...plz if anyone knows somewhere who sells it or someone who wants to sell it with a nice condition and a nice price..PLZ PLZ and i repeat PLZ tell me!!!

i might sound crazy saying so but i'm strongly attached to this mobile...help if u can!

note:

the details:

Nokia 7373

L'amour collection

pink only !

i want to rit many things but everything mixed up together...i've been so exhausted l8ly and i hate the fact tht i don't have much fun anymore...i don't watch t.v , i don't go out thank God i have some time to eat and pray....
am i doing this on purpose? sometimes i feel as if i like torturing myself...or some stupid way of hiding from whtever...
still...
i'm a happy person elhamdolelah...yes i am happy, i am a cheerful person i have many reasons to be so.
enough tht many of the people around me like to c me happy and smiling always...shouldn't i take it as a good reason?.
anyways i guess i should run now...i have alot to do and a big day tomorrow