Monday, October 25, 2010

Random thoughts

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i'm sitting beside the window, as it started to rain. i just couldn't stop thinking of tht day..tht day when you took me on ur silver unicorn. we flow away in the sky, and looked at the tiny earth with our eyes.


we simply left everything behind and went through our inner selves, another world.


we spoke as if we knew eachother since our life started.my scraf began to move genetly along with the wind.
actually my life really started tht day =)
i lost all the sense of time , all the sense of distance...i didn't think of anything except ur words...and my unspoken words.
my numb feelings started to grove,my heart beats as if a mountain moved.
i saw myself through ur eyes...and nothing else i need from this world =)




i wondered...r u feeling the same?
well, it's ok i don't really care, i'm satsified coz i'm sure of wht i feel

now, the moment is over u put me safly back on earth, and ever since tht day....i just sit there beside the window as it started to rain... nothing i can do except

Wishing so hard..dreaming so hard...praying so hard.....and having faith from the deep of my heart

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Random thoughts

some times we spend the best time in our lives, but we don't realize it untill it ends. it can eve be few moments but it means alot, in fact you can spend all the rest of your life remembering it and smiling , wondering could i ever get those days back?
maybe yes...or maybe it's better to wait for better days.
i still like how i feel these days...things r kinda going on smoothly, yes... it's better not to rush in.
i'm praying very hard
i'm praying for you my lord and u know wht i want.
the reason y i'm praying so hard for this, is tht i believe so much in wht i'm feeling rit now, i trust my choice and i think i'm ready. i trust my God and i trust my heart tht's y i'm sure tht God will answer my prayers...and i'm leaving out all the rest.

Sunday, October 17, 2010

Random thoughts

i just noticed tht i used to call my post, random thought-1 , random tought-2...but i don't count them any more. it seems tht they all became the same , maybe my whole life became the same.
it's depressing when it's hard to express ur feelings, words ran't coming out easily as they used to.

i was checking some pix and found this one on my way, and it's so true a simple word can heal or tear...
i wish i hear the words i wanna hear. i wish i can say many things, yet i dont know how it's gonna be if i let those words out..
oh how i wish life would b much easier than tht.

Saturday, October 16, 2010

Random thoughts

There r times were i feel too weak, too helpless tht i can't do anything and i simply feel tht i'm falling apart and the best solution is to shut my eyes and never wakeup.
i feel very tired, many things to do in very short time. many ppl tht i have to listen to...when no one feels my inner silent screaming.
i wish we had restart button like the computer, i'll get to restart all over agin without thinking of the old days...
when i look bk at my life i c tht i was totally different, it's not abt being better or being worse...
but some wounds remain in ur heart forever...reminds u of how much it hurted when ever u try to smile and b happy.
am i still broken?
is my heart still bleeding?
sometimes i stand on feet and let my head up high.i lay bk on the ground and stare on the sky...i look at the shining stars and i name each star with a dream of mine...but then they disappear, they simply start to vanish in the sky.
and tht's were i slowly start to crumble,i start to break down and fall apart..and think million times... was it my fault?
i don't regret anything tht i did in mylife, but i regret for not doing things tht i think i should have done...things i should've said.
sometimes i have to pretend tht i laugh...i even laugh hysterically tht my friends say..." r u crazy".
i don't understand
i don't understand anything....

Saturday, October 09, 2010

Random thoughts

ok so is there something wrong? with me ? maybe? i don't know.i feel kinda happy...kinda like butterflies, or even better...i feel like dipping sushi in soya sauce.
i love the way i feel now, althought i don't get it but it makes me listen to every single romantic song i used to listen to. makes me wanna dance and dream.
actually it gives me hope..it's gives me oxygen.
let's wait and c...wht's still hidding =)

Wednesday, October 06, 2010

Random thoughts



i looked to my self in the mirror and stared alittle bit, am i weird person? am i freak? y am i stubborn? y do i hate to break the rules...
i hate to feel tht there r any gates or fence around me, maybe tht's y i lock myself into my fantasy world.
i admit i'm an awkward combination...too many things tht it's hard to be in a noraml human being...umm things like...

i love wrestling
i love pink colour
i love metal,rock, pop,rap and instrumental songs
i play bass guitar
i played violin
i love dalida and fayroz and mahmoud el essily
sometimes i listen to abu el lef and even tamora! *but i don't love them ya3ni*
i love horror movies althought i get scared sometimes...i love to scare myself
i LOVE dogs...sometimes even more than some ppl
i LOVE writing
i LOVE teaching
i LOVE cilantro
i LOVE riding bikes
i LOVE my powerpuff girls dolls
i LOVE watching cartoon
i LOVE chinese food and dresses
i LOVE reading
i hate to tidy up things...my room is a simi-organized chaoes
i love to add my touch in everything i have
i'm sentimental yet ma3ndesh dam
i love spirtual things
i don't shake hands with guys...and i'm very happy tht i don't
i love doing manythings even if i don't have the time for them
i love laying on bed,,stare at the celling and starts..thinking
i love long rides with my headphones on
i believe i'm a good driver..i don't drive like women
i love nature....esp the sea with sunset
i believe i'm a princess
i love singing yet my voice is TERRIBLE...

tht's all i can remember abt myself...now tell me who can even bear living with a person like tht! lol no one?

Sunday, October 03, 2010

Random thoughts

Today went in a very good day more than i've expected.
i entered 2 classes by myself for the 1st time in grade 8 and grade 9...
i kids r ADORABLE they r full of life, full of love.... they just need to have more faith...more hope and more dreams...
i loved being with them today...i felt tht they needed to vent, they need to know many thing about life more than study this and that.
Grade 8 were toooooo sweet, i can't believe tht 2 hours passed so quickly i didn't want to leave.
i asked them to rit me a feedback, and i found cutest feed back ever!
tht made me more excited and motivated...i knew tht this is where i belong.
i'm so overwhelmed tht they accepted me and loved me...
they really lifted my spirit up high.
as for grade 9 , i can deny tht i was soo worried b4 going to them, and actually the 1st hours was a total mess! i was about to collapse.
i think some of them hate me alot rit now, but by the 2nd hour things got little better, and by the end of the lesson we were all laughing from our hearts..
i loved being with them as well although it's too hard to deal with them.. they don't give any kind of expression tht u never understand their needs.
so far i feel tht i'm doing good elhamdolelah...

Thanks to u my beloved LORD i wouldn't have done anything without u.

Saturday, October 02, 2010

Random thoughts

God is great! reallly!!! i trust him i have soooooo much faith i know he's doing the ebst thing for me....Thank God for everything....
i was tht close to lose my mind...when all of a sudden my great lord saved me !
it was more like magic!
thank u for being my LORD...thank u God for everything...i know there r still good news coming isA
i believe
i have faith...