Wednesday, February 02, 2011

Me, after the 25th of jan

It’s been a very tough week, I can’t believe tht I stayed at home for a whole week! I feel as if I’m in a big dream. I can’t believe tht it’s happening to my beloved beloved Egypt.

I had mixed up feeling, worried, fear, happy, frustration and confusion. I was totally lost! Don’t know who to believe any more.

I never felt afraid like the past few days, it was more like “I’m legend” movie..when the night comes we hide in our houses closing all the windows and doors, preparing weapons beside us in case we r under any kind of attacks. All the men of our neighborhood gather outside to protect our street, I can’t sleep unless I hear their voices in the street, and still I can’t sleep.

Days were exactly the same; we wake up me, mum and dad. We open the T.V and change from one news channel to another. We call all the family and friends to check on, and some ppl call us..even my sister call from KSA every day. Some friends called me, some of my students, unexpected ppl which made me really surprised. Ppl I hoped tht they’d call but didn’t…it’s ok maybe I’m just not on their priority list.  on the bright side these events made ppl call each other and ask about each other.
Then my dad goes out for a while with the neighbors…and finally we try to sleep.

I pray every night tht the morning would come, but time moves very very slowly. Am I really dreaming? I thought how is it going in Palestine, Iraq and war countries? How do the people manage their lives their?. Do they face this fear every single day? Do they sleep on gun shots, knowing tht at in any moment someone would simply come and kill them? Feeling insecure is the worst feeling EVER. May no one would ever get tht feeling.

I cry whenever I see the news…whenever I hear tht someone was killed..whenever I feel terribly worried on every single person I know…now over 300 ppl were killed..Places destroyed…my favorite places tht hold many happy memories. It’s just so hard to c ur country falling apart…and for wht?? It’s not just abt freedom anymore!

My heart is breaking for u Egypt, you don’t deserve all of this.

Now who is going to bring bk those martyrs who died? Whether they were from the police or citizens..they r humans they r Egyptians

I want to sleep without locking the doors, I want to go out without fearing people, I want to work and hangout with my friends , laugh and go shopping , go out with my bike , make the change I wish to see in the world… i want my life back. I want my country back.

May God protect us and fill our hearts with his love.


dina ahmed said...

i loved what u said,its really the truth...wish everyone to read it..god save "Egypt"

lulu said...

god bless u and eygpt