Saturday, March 08, 2008

i feel as if i'm in a weird dream..i don't know wht's going on...i don't know wht am i doing.
as if it been yrs and yes actually it been yrs...lots of yrs.
many thing changed...whenever march comes...i recall my very old memories...coz it's the month were everthing started to take another way and my life became upside down.
march...the changing point...
sometimes i think for a while and ask myself a question.." is it really me? am i tht person who is now?" mostly the answer is NO.
i don't want to turn back the way i was and still i feel weird for the way i am now.
i want to stand still...i want to stop thinking of my past...i don't want it to affect my future or at least my present...especially tht i feel i'm so close to make my dreams come true.
whenever i'm closer whenever i feel more afraid...i don't want to be hunted.
i don't want to be left alone...i feel so weak and don't want to slip down again.
i hope tht march pass as fast as it can...or else can't we just skip it? can i remove it or delete it from the whole yr! can i go on as if it's april or something??
oh God! wht the hell am i saying!
i think i'm only......bored

1 comment:

DUON said...

Shams, The past will always be there. It's a part of you. Use the past in your advantage. Don't let the ''Past'' control you as a puppet. Cut the strings that's attached to you, to strangle the past bad memories. I hope it will help you move on .

Shams, it's okay to feel that you are a new person. You're not going to be the same Shams that you are now within a decade. We all get affected by our surroundings, that helps adapt our human nature to any circumstances.

Always look at your past achievements,(Turn the past to your own advantage),when you're in a bad mood, let the haters sweep up your failures in life. They make good maids :)

Cheer up, girl